Because the Kids Are Watching: A Lesson in Leading by Example

One story from our trip to Berlin that I never shared but holds such a deep, profound place in my heart - and I believe is valuable for others to hear- begins during one of our shakeout runs a couple of days before the marathon.

I was running along the streets of Berlin with my teammates. As we ran along, I realized after a few blocks that something was different.

Every time we got to a corner and the light was red for us to cross, everyone was standing there. Yet we looked both ways, and if it was clear, we would run across the road.

This happened a few times before I realized the people in Germany didn’t cross the roads. They obeyed the traffic signs.

And I realized as an American, I grew to see the sign as optional, not the rule.

This was humbling to me to see I wasn’t obeying and honoring their rules.

On one of our last nights in Berlin, I shared this story with a relative who lives there. She shared that she did this once and ended up having a police officer approach her. He asked her if she understood why he stopped her. And she said she knew why because she crossed the road when the light said not to.

Then he asked why it matters that she follow the rules.

And then what he said is why I share this story.

“Because the kids are watching.”

These words have remained with me since September and will remain with me always.

Why?

Because our choices matter. Not just for ourselves but for our kids and future generations.

We are to lead them well, set the example of what is good, right, honoring, and acceptable. And when we fall short, we are to humble ourselves to take responsibility for our wrongs so that our kids learn to do that too.

Imagine what a difference this would make in our homes, communities, and world if we made choices that honored God while taking seriously the fact that our kids are watching.

We can’t change if other people live this way, yet we can choose to live this way ourselves. It won’t always be easy, but it will be what’s right.

I share this with you to invite you to join me to…

pause. breathe. pray.

May we remember our kids are watching. They are listening. May we take this to heart and choose to live in a way that leads them well and exemplifies the character of Christ, such as love, compassion, humility, and selflessness.

With love and hope,

Shawn

“Set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, and in purity.” - 1 Timothy 4:12

What’s Clogging Your Life and Keeping You From Living Fully?

The other day I was cleaning out the drain in one of our showers. Then this morning, our washing machine clogged up, and I had to clean that drain as well. As I pulled out clump after clump of gunk, it struck me how much buildup had accumulated, quietly and gradually over time, to the point it finally began to prevent the shower and washer from working the way they were meant to.

This made me pause and wonder, what is clogging my life and inhibiting me from functioning optimally?

There are thoughts, habits, patterns, and choices in my life that may not be harmful in obvious ways, but over time they are inhibiting me from living fully. I want to take an honest, careful look at what they are so that I can make the changes that are needed.

I share this with you in case you want to join me and ask yourself the question as well, “What is clogging my life and keeping me from living more fully as God intends?”

If so, I invite you to join me to…

pause. breathe. pray.

May we make time to sit with ourselves with love, compassion and grace. May we take an honest look at what no longer serves a good purpose in our lives, from thoughts we have to choices we make. And if we have trouble seeing this, let’s reach out to a trusted friend to help us.

Once we are aware, then we can choose to take the steps, no matter how small, to clear out what isn’t beneficial to create room for what brings us life.

Let’s make this a priority so that at the end of our days, we look back with gratitude for how we chose to live, and not with regret.

With love and hope,
Shawn

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight and the sin that clings so closely, and let us run with perseverance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus… - Hebrews 12:1

Why Sharing Compliments Can Change Someone’s Day

Matt usually takes the bus but yesterday we had a slower morning so I offered to drive him to school. At drop off, the security guard was standing there and when Matt got out of the car, he bent down to make eye contact with me and said some kind words about Matt. Not only did I hear this, but Matt did too.

As a mom, this warmed my heart. Yes it’s nice to hear kind words about your kids yet what also stayed with me is that this man chose to speak a compliment aloud instead of keeping it to himself.

How many times do we think a compliment and don’t share it?

I share this today to invite you to join me to…

pause. breathe. pray.

I heard once withholding a compliment is like having a gift for someone that you never give them. Rather than holding on to that gift, let’s choose to share it with others. Let’s speak life into others by sharing the compliments we think. We may never know how a simple act of love like this can positively impact someone. Let’s choose to share the compliments, not in a fluffy surface way, but in a I see your character and want to reflect to you that you are seen and appreciated kind of way, as the security guard did for Matt yesterday.

With love and hope,
Shawn

A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver. - Proverbs 25:11

On World Cancer Day, Let's Pause. Breathe. and Pray Together

On World Cancer Day, let’s come together to…

pause. breathe. pray.

…for the families and friends who have lost loved ones.

…for the fighters of every age.

…for those newly diagnosed.

…for those who fight alone.

…for those without access to care or carrying the financial burden of care.

…for those waiting for results.

…for survivors, in remission or NED, no evidence of disease.

…for the caretakers.

…for the loved ones, of every age, walking beside someone they love.

…for the doctors.

…for the nurses.

…for the admins in the offices.

…for the volunteers.

…for the researchers.

…for the foundations and organizations raising money.

…for funds.

…for cures.

…for how we can support those who have lost a loved one, who are in the fight, and those who are still with us.

With love and hope,
Shawn

PS If you or someone you know has cancer, visit HERE for free resources for those diagnosed with cancer and for those supporting a loved one with cancer💕🙏💕

You’re Not Just There for You: Finding God’s Purpose in Everyday Places

Yesterday, I went for a wellness checkup at the doctor’s. On the way there, I remembered something I learned years ago that gave me perspective for the appointment, and beyond.

Sometimes, when I go places, I am more focused on myself than on anyone else. When I go to a doctor’s appointment, I think about wanting to hear that all is well. When I go to the store, I think about what I need to get. While those things matter, they aren’t our whole purpose for being there.

We aren’t always there just for ourselves.

Sometimes God places us in certain places, at certain moments in time, so that others can encourage us, or so that we can be a reflection of His love to others.

Remembering this yesterday shifted my perspective as I drove to the appointment. Instead of being so focused on myself, I focused on being present for others who might need a listening ear. And while I was there, a couple of people shared their stories with me, one about something challenging they are going through, and another about a loved one dying of cancer.

Being present with these people and letting them know they were seen and heard was a blessing to them, and to me.

I share this as a reminder that wherever we go, whether to the doctor’s office, the store, or an event, we aren’t just there for ourselves. I invite you to join me to…

pause. breathe. pray.

Wherever we are going, may we remember that our purpose there goes beyond what we see on the surface. Your presence matters where you are. May we pray that God helps us live aligned with His purpose for us, to be a reflection of His love to others, no matter where we are. And in doing so, may it broaden our perspective so that even what we think is a mundane appointment may actually be a divine one.

With love and hope,
Shawn

“Let each of you look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.” - Philippians 2:4

Until Further Notice, Celebrate Everything

This week has been heavy in various ways. I almost didn’t share this because it seemed wrong. Yet this morning I woke up with Gabe Grunewald’s words echoing in my head, “until further notice, celebrate everything!”

And I knew I needed to share this. Not just for me, but because we still need to share what is good in the world. The dark and heavy are real, yet so is the good. May we be sure to not only acknowledge the heavy things in life but take time to…

pause. breathe. pray.

And celebrate what is good too.

With love and hope,
Shawn

A Lesson in Love: How My Mom Inspires Kindness in Everyday Moments

Today I went to the UConn game with my Mom. In this heavy world, sometimes it’s good to be reminded about how a little love goes a long way.

While we were at the game, my mom wasn’t just there to cheer on the team, she was there to cheer on people she met along the way.

On our way in, she walked past a person working by the door, she said hello and wished them warmth on this frigid day. While we were in our seats we saw one of the people working stop on the stairs to help a little girl tie her shoes so she wouldn’t trip. It was such a sweet moment and my mom wanted to be sure to thank him for his act of love. The guy behind us said he was hungry and she offered him some of her food. As we walked to the car, she thanked the officer who was directing traffic for being there.

My mom is a bundle of love looking to share it wherever she can. Being with her today was a reminder to me that we cannot always change what’s happening outside ourselves, but we have a choice about who we are going to be. And my mom is love in action.

I share this today as a reminder to myself, and to you, in case you needed it, that we are called to be love in action too.

I invite you to join me to…

pause. breathe. pray.

Wherever we are today, and wherever we go, may we choose to keep our eyes and ears open to the people around us. May we speak the truth in love to others, building others up by honoring who they are and what they do for us, and others, or answer a need if we can. Even though this may not seem like much, it’s everything.

I hope you too can be inspired by my Mom like I was today💗

With love and hope,
Shawn

How to Live an Unmeasured Life: Stop Tracking, Start Feeling Free

Living an unmeasured life.

This is my goal this year.

I don’t know about you but I was at the point in my life where I was measuring too much.

I had a check list I would keep in my prayer journal to check off my spiritual, relational, intellectual, emotional, career, physical, and financial goals.

As a wellness teacher, I believe in S.M.A.R.T. goals, yet I personally have gotten to a point where if I got to the end of my day and didn’t check the box, my inner dialogue would be focused on what I didn’t do rather on what I did accomplish that day.

I am in a place where I know what serves me best so that I can serve others well. So this year I am stepping away from tracking my life and will be more focused on living my life.

At the end of the day, I don’t want to see that I am 100 steps short of my goal, I want to see that I enjoyed my walk on the trail with a friend, or by myself. I want to know I made time to visit with my neighbor instead of making sure I listened to a podcast. I want to make room to be more present with, and for, others rather than focusing on my checklist, giving myself the freedom for God to move my feet instead of having my steps predetermined each day.

I will share that I’ve stopped tracking the steps on my walks, and it is freeing!

I will be transparent that I am running a race in June so I will need to track my mileage to train, but that is what it needs to be, a tool, not a measure of my worth.

I share all of this in case you too have reached a point where life has become a checklist of goals to complete each day. If so, I invite you to join me to…

pause. breathe. pray.

May we release the need to check off lists to feel like we are enough. May we stop measuring our lives by our own standards, or by the standards other people have set for us. Instead, may we live close to God and the principles He calls us to. When we do this, we are freed from the checklists, from the feeling of not being enough, and we will find greater freedom, joy and peace within - which is what we are all aiming for anyways, isn’t it?

With love and hope,
Shawn

Honoring Community Heroes: Remembering Those Who Serve Quietly

It’s been a wintry wonderland over here this weekend. And as beautiful as it is, my thoughts are beyond the snow covered trees. I keep thinking about the people who get up in the middle of the night to salt and clear the roads. The ones who run on coffee and their hearts to serve and take care of their communities. While we sleep and remain comfortable, there are people working to ensure safe roads for the rest of us.

This week our community lost someone who did just this, two boys lost their Dad, parents lost their son, a sister lost a brother and many of us lost a friend.

I share this today as a reminder that there are people quietly serving in our communities every day. From plowing the roads in winter, mowing the common areas around town in the summer, taking care of the towns pools and other facilities. They work off hours, their names often aren’t known by the larger community, yet their efforts daily make our communities the comfortable, safe places they are.

I invite you to join me to…

pause. breathe. pray.

May we always remember the helpers, the ones who choose work that serve our communities. May we give thanks for the work of their hearts and hands, and when we get a chance, let’s be sure to say thank you to them for who they are and all they do, every season.

Thank you, Dave. Your presence will be missed as a friend, and in our community🙏

With love and care,
Shawn

Processing Emotions with Faith: The Power of Pausing, Praying, and Letting Go

Yesterday I brought Gavin back to school. It was a great month with everyone back in the house. Yet reality is, it’s not where Kate and Gav need to be anymore. They need to continue to grow into their future selves elsewhere.

After dropping Gavin off, I went to grab my phone to call someone but I paused.

I went to grab food in the car to eat, but I paused again.

I went to play some music but turned the radio off.

I was sad.

And that pause showed me how rather than acknowledging my emotions, I was looking to distract myself and fill myself with other things- conversation, food, distraction.

So I sat there driving and acknowledged my sadness. I prayed about how I was sad and that I know my kids are where they need to be yet I was still sad to let them go again.

And then I did something I don’t allow myself to do often enough.

I cried. Like ugly cried and it was so therapeutic. Rather than stuffing away my emotions, I was able to process and pray through them.

And afterwards? I felt lighter. I didn’t need to dwell in the sadness, I just needed that time to release it.

I share this with you today in case any of you too don’t allow yourself to process your emotions.

I invite you to join me to…

pause. breathe. pray.

May we remember God gave us our emotions and it’s okay to have them. Instead of turning to the phone, the food, the music, or whatever your go-tos are, may we pause long enough to acknowledge our emotions. Let’s pray how we can process them in a healthy way, even if that requires an ugly cry. Let’s do this so rather than stuffing those emotions away internally and keep them with us, we release them and learn from them, as I was thankful to do yesterday.

With love and hope,
Shawn