This is my crew. I love them so much but admittedly life doesn’t always look as joyful as our walk was today. I love them so much that our life can be messy.
One of these messy moments was last fall. I didn’t realize it until a couple months post treatment. One day it hit me that the fear of not knowing if the cancer would return and how long I had with my kids gripped my heart. That fear had caused me to be shoving life lessons in my kids ears day and night. Rather than loving them where they were, I ended up imposing my post cancer perspective onto my sweet 11, 10 and 5 year old🤦♀️
My dear friend who I shared this with happens to be a chef and said, “so you are feeding them appetizers, main course and dessert all at once?” Yes I was😏
Why was I doing that?
Because I feared I wouldn’t be here to teach them everything they needed to know about life so I invited ... no I didn’t ask them ... I gave them a five-course meal of life everyday for a couple of months😔
The night I realized that I was force feeding them life lessons I went to bed crying, so sad I had been been unintentionally doing that to them. As I wept in bed I was praying and strongly felt God speak into my heart. He told me that I would have enough time to teach my children what is mine to teach them and anything else they need to know, they’ll learn from someone else.
A peace washed over me in that moment. I realized that I am not here to force feed my children life lessons, but to walk beside them where they are in life and invite them to the table beside me to enjoy each bite together along the way.
It wasn’t easy to see this truth about what I had been doing but once I saw it, I did my best to start meeting them where they are and enjoy the moments I had with them rather than fearing the moments I would miss.
Today was a beautiful day, filled with memories with my crew. Although I may not be a perfect Mom, I am their Mom and I couldn’t be more grateful to walk beside them in life and sit around the table with them everyday💝
I share this with you in case you too have messy moments as a parent. May we see our imperfections as teachable moments, for us, and for our children to learn from. I invite you to join me to...
Pause. Breathe. Pray.
May we know that there is no such thing as a perfect parent. May we each simply do our best, which will look different day to day, and trust that whatever is ours to teach our children, they will learn. The most important thing we can do is walk beside them where they are and invite them to sit at the table of life with us and encourage them to savor every bite along the way.
With love and hope,
Shawn