I Believe

Screen Shot 2021-01-04 at 9.09.15 AM.png

Last night we watched Polar Express. At the end when then boy says, “I believe,” I was brought back to this moment in my life when I said, “I believe” to God.

At the end of 2009 I hit bottom in a pit of depression which took me months to work through with the help of family, therapy and meds. Yet there was something else in those months that came my way, my parents and dear friend, who was a Christian, encouraged me to pray. So I tried it on for size asking God if he was even there, and if he was, did he hear me? or care?

For months I was throwing up questions to God asking to help me, if that was possible and if so, to give me direction in life.

The one day in June 2010 I was in the kitchen cooking and Kate and Gavin were in there with me. Kate was four and Gavin had just turned three. Kate was practicing her letters and Gavin asked if he could practice his letters too. I handed him a piece of paper and a pen I had on the counter and I went back to cooking. Before long Gavin said excitedly, “Mommy, I wrote my name! Come and see!” He had never attempted to write his letters before so I stopped what I was doing to see what his interpretation of his name looked like. What I saw stopped me in my tracks. What he had written was...

God 7

I looked at it in awe, I was speechless. I gave Gav a huge hug and told him what he had written. He smiled and walked away, floating back into his three year old world while I sat there holding this piece of paper in my hand. I looked at it dumbfounded, G-o-d 7.

I had no idea what to make of the 7 but God, that was pretty clear to see (I later learned 7 is the most biblical number meaning completeness). That day, God worked through my son to capture my heart. I sat there with tears in my eyes and turned to God and said, “I believe”...and I haven’t looked back since.

I share this with you today because I know in my heart there is someone who is needed a message of hope today. There is someone who is asking, “God, are you even there?” like I was 10 years ago. And with Christmas on the horizon, I thought it is a fitting time to invite you to join me to...

pause. breathe. pray.

I know it can sound out there and different but the truth of my heart is that choosing to believe in God, and His son, Jesus, truly transformed my life. And I know it will do the same for you. I invite you to look beyond the surface of what Christmas is all about, Jesus’s birth, and ask yourself, do you believe? If not, that’s fine. I get it as I’ve been there. Yet I encourage you to start your own conversation with God. He will be present, loving and patient with you, as He was with me. And I will be praying that as you try prayer on for size, you also find yourself saying the words, “I believe,” too.

With love and hope,

Shawn

Who is it that overcomes the world except the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God? - 1 John 5:5